Tell Me I was Dreaming
by queen-of-swing
Summary: Proto Zoa has done a bad thing. AU. Rating for language and brief sexual references.


**Disclaimer: I don't own the lyrics herein contained in the following. I also do not own any of the names you recognize. Travis Tritt owns and makes/has made loads of money from 'Tell Me I Was Dreaming', I, on the other hand, don't own/have not made money off of them.**

**Authors Notes: This idea came to me when I was driving home from somewhere, and I caught a snippet of this song. After downloading it and finding the lyrics, I made up my mind to write it. The rating is PG-13 because of subject matter: sexual references, some language, and suicidal references. If you are uncomfortable with any of this; please, do not read any further. Special thanks go out to Littlemissdrama, for her beta-ing efforts, and to both her and J.L. Jordan, for all the ideas and constructive criticism they've offered.**

**================**

**Tell Me I Was Dreaming**

**Queen of Swing**

**15/7/04**

**================**

**Tell Me I was Dreaming**

**Travis Tritt/Bruce Ray Brown**

**When I woke up this morning**

**Wiped the sleep from my eyes**

**Found a new day dawning**

**And suddenly I realize**

**You're gone**

**Chorus:**

**Tell me I was dreaming**

**That you didn't leave me here to cry**

**You didn't say you don't love me anymore**

**And it was just my imagination telling lies**

**Tell me that you didn't say goodbye**

**I'm in a state of confusion**

**I hope things aren't what they seem**

**If this is really happening**

**Just let me go back to dream**

**You're home**

**================**

A pale beige ceiling slowly came into focus as Proto Zoa began to wake up. He took a deep breath as he rubbed his eyes, making it more comfortable to look around. He felt extremely satisfied from the night before; having made love to his wife and experiencing the indescribable closeness only lovers share. Hearing her still-even breathing, he rolled over and buried his face in his pillow, lying on his stomach.

He reached over, blindly, to stroke Zenon's hair, and was surprised to feel a strange length and texture to it. He quickly sat up to investigate. Looking over next to him, he saw a mass of chestnut brown hair with auburn highlights and ringlet curls on the pillow next to his. A sheet covered her body, but there was no mistaking that she was not Zenon. He quickly took in his surroundings, breath quickening as realization seeped in. Over on the easy chair, facing the bed, was a dangerously low-cut red dress, a dress that Zenon would never wear. He forced himself to calm down, thinking perhaps she'd bought it as a surprise to him. But, wait, why would her hair be brown? The panicky feeling started low in his stomach again, boiling up to his throat.

The tense silence was broken by the rustle of sheets and a strange voice, "Good morning, lover," a light but throaty tone offered. She sat up, revealing her face, and most definitely assuring she was not Zenon. "Beautiful sunrise, isn't it?"

"Ah, I suppose," he said quickly. He didn't want to offend her, but the combination of a tiring week and an overload on alcohol inhibited his ability to remember her name. "Wha- What is your name?" He asked.

"You don't remember baby?" She paused, laughing. "I guess I shouldn't be surprised; you were drinking like an alcoholic that had been stuck in the desert for a year and just found an oasis," she paused again, "Marla. My name is Marla, and you are an amazing lay."

"No, no this can't be happening," he said aloud, mainly so he could hear it.

"Oh, yes, it can be, and I'm very glad it is," she said, climbing out of bed and sauntering over to him, sans sheet. She used the long, red nail on her index finger to lift his chin to look at her. "I know I don't regret it," she said in a husky whisper.

"I do! I have a wife that I love!" He exploded. "I wouldn't have done something like this. You seduced me, didn't you, you whore," he said, accusingly.

She laughed the insult off, saying, "If you call me accepting the many drinks you bought me, then dancing with you as you grinded into me from behind seducing, then yeah, I seduced you, but the way I see it, all the effort was made by you," she chuckled.

"No. I didn't sleep with you; I wouldn't do that to Zenon!" He fairly shouted.

"Hate to break it to you, but you did," she replied, an annoyed tone creeping into her voice as she gestured to an empty contraceptive wrapper on the end table. Realization hit him alongside a sudden wave of nausea, as he sat down and clutched his midsection in horror and fear.

_"Zenon wasn't here last night,"_ his mind rationed. _"You could just get her out of the house, and make sure all evidence is destroyed and everything will be alright."_ He thought about it for a moment, and realized it was true. _"No!"_ the angelic part of his psyche screamed. "_Don't be a coward and act like it didn't happen. It did, and Zenon has a right to know."_ He knew the second part to be truer than the first, but it was still too much to think about for the moment, so he shook his head, clearing his mind completely. Unbidden, a thought crept into his mind again, _"But she wouldn't know…"_

"Uh, look, Marla, Margot, whoever you are, you need to leave, and now," he said, handing her the trashy dress from the chair. Huffing angrily, Marla stepped into her dress and pulled it up over her bosom, sliding the straps up her shoulders.

After she slipped her strappy shoes on, Zoa lead her by the elbow to the front door of his palatial abode. Their palatial abode.

"I won't forget last night," she said, handing him a tiny piece of fabric, supposed to suffice as underwear.

After watching her drive away, he stepped back inside, failing to notice that Zenon's pale blue bug was pulled up to their garage.

================

Proto Zoa stepped under the pounding jets of water, trying to wash the night away. He soaped up his loofah, furiously scrubbing his body to the point of rawness, trying to forget what he had done.

_"Okay, think about it,"_ one part of him thought. _"She doesn't have to know. She was at her Aunt's all night, taking care of Halley and Cosma. She was spending the night, I know, she didn't want to drive all that way in the middle of the night. She wasn't here. She wouldn't know. You could get away with it. Telling her would only ruin the two of you. Don't tell her. She wasn't here. She wouldn't know. You could get away with it,"_ the same devious thoughts circulated in his head, eventually becoming indistinguishable from the speed and number of them.

_"No."_ the devious side's counterpart offered. _"She's been nothing but good to you. Think, what would happen if you didn't tell her now, and she found out later? You'd be sold up the river, that's what! Now, what's the worst case scenario this can bring?"_ He thought about it a moment, coming up with the setting.

__

_The room was barely lit, a solitary lamp offering the only brightness to the dull room. She was sitting in the chair next to it, doing nothing. She sat in eerie silence, contemplating just what she planned to say to him when he came home. She had been rearranging the furniture earlier that day, when she found an old designer thong behind the dresser. Knowing for sure it wasn't hers, and that it wasn't his for wearing, she immediately knew what happened. Using her old sleuthing skills that had been at rest for years, she researched just how old the garment was by what year it had been in style. Based on her research, it was at least 3 years old, which meant it was from their first year of marriage. He'd cheated on her within the first twelve months, who knew how much more he'd done it over the past 4 years. The door slid open, and he traipsed in._

_"Hello darling," he said, kissing her cheek. "Why are there so few lights on?" To be honest, she didn't quite know. It had been a dark afternoon, and with her discovery, it seemed to fit her mood. But she had since calmed down, into a relaxing blue. She didn't lean in to his kiss, just continued to stare forward._

_"Zee, love, what's wrong?" He asked, concern filling his dark brown eyes._

_She still, said nothing, but handed him the underwear that had been hidden from sight by a pillow. His eyes widened, but he said nothing. Slowly, she handed him her keys, followed by her platinum engagement ring and wedding band. He looked down at the contents of his hands as she stood._

_As calm as the eye of a hurricane, she said, "Goodbye," and walked out the door._

_He stood there, frozen in place as he heard her car start up, and squeal out of the driveway, tears streaming down his cheeks._

__

Cold water jostled him out of his daydream, signaling the end of his shower. He stepped out of the enclosed area and walked up to the big mirror, wiping the foggy vapors off. Staring himself dead in the eye, "Tell me it was all a dream. She still loves me and she hasn't left. It was just my imagination," he said to his reflection. A sudden burst of fearful anger had him screaming at himself, "TELL ME SHE DIDN'T SAY GOODBYE!" before he broke down into heart wrenching sobs.

================

After urging the redness and puffiness crying brings away, Proto Zoa began to get dressed. Selecting a pair of soft athletic training pants and a sleeveless shirt, he went downstairs. He'd made up his mind not to tell her, and made sure to destroy and dispose of any evidence that had been left. He made his way downstairs to have some breakfast and coffee, before working out. Zee would be home by 11, supposedly, so he planned to use the time before her arrival in the most beneficial way he could think of. Hanging a right into the kitchen, he walked to the coffee maker automatically, grabbing a cup and pouring some, beginning to drink before realizing that he hadn't made any coffee. He slowly put his cup down, eyes darting back and forth to make sure he wasn't about to be bludgeoned senseless by a burglar. Seeing no one, he turned towards the breakfast alcove, only to face the cool blue eyes of his beautiful wife.

His jaw fairly dropped as he managed to get out, "Ze- Zenon!"

She smiled at him, cheerfully standing and coming over to him. She pressed herself against him, wrapping her arms around his neck. "Did you survive your night alone?" She asked, giggling, before kissing him fervently.

He didn't resist at all, kissing her back with an equal amount of intensity. Finally breaking the bond, he looked at her with mixed emotions, love and confusion. "Zenon, darling, what are you doing home so early?"

"Mm, I don't like being away from you. I woke up on the couch and I missed you baby, so I came on home," she replied, kissing him again.

"And I don't mind it one bit," he said. "How long have you been home?"

"About 15 minutes," she replied, "Why?"

"Ah, because, I kind of… messed up," he confessed slowly.

"What do you mean?" She asked, thinking he'd tell her about the affair she'd come home to witness early that morning. Undesired, the memory came floating back to her.

__

_Zenon had originally planned to stay the whole night at Judy and Plank's, rather than drive home at some ungodly hour, after watching the kids while their parents were at a dinner party. It would have suited her just fine to have her two cousins spend the night at her house on the hill, but Judy was concerned about Cosma having to leave the familiarity of her room for the night, so Zenon was fully willing to take care of them in their home environment. Zoa was supposed to come with her, originally, but had an extremely busy week with laying down tracks for his solo album, so he decided to forgo kid duty for an early bedtime. Zenon kissed him goodbye and headed for Judy's, and he, in turn, went to bed early._

_But to no avail. He couldn't sleep and only tossed and turned with out her there as his stronghold, so he finally got up to have some of his favorite ice cream, Chocolate Chip. Just as he sat down to the bowl, his zap pad beeped, demanding his attention. On the other end of the line, was Germ, Microbe's bassist. He told Zoa about a wild party that was going on at some other rocker's house and invited him to join in the fun. Deciding it couldn't hurt, he went and partied. His definition of partying included excessive drinking, dancing and hooking up. He had been a changed man since he and Zenon had began dating, and definitely not since he'd been married. He had a semi-promiscuous past, and it hadn't been unknown of him to have one night stands. But that had all changed, since she meant everything to him. Unfortunately, the alcohol changed his mind. A drunken stupor and a surplus of beautiful women didn't make a good combination, and before long, he was in bed with Marla, going at it._

_Around that time, one thirty AM, Zenon pulled into the driveway. She knew they didn't have a red sports car, so a red flag was sent up immediately. Thinking it was just one of his buddies over to hang out, she went inside. She slowly explored the house, starting in the hotel-lobby living room, then to the kitchen, gym, and entertainment room, but still could not find any sign of him or his friend. Sighing, she headed upstairs to look around up there, thinking he might be in bed. But why would the car still be there? She didn't have an excuse, unless his pal was too plastered to drive, which meant she'd be cleaning the guestroom the next day. On her trek to their bedroom, she checked the guest room to see if the guy was passed out in there, but the bed was still made and there was no sign of anyone even going in. _

_ Things were getting weirder and weirder as she went on. She closed the door behind her, and made her way to their room, where she heard some odd noises. Curiosity piqued, Zee pushed the partially opened door fully open. At what she saw inside made her eyes go wide and her mouth drop, along with her heart. There was her supposedly loving husband, very passionately having sex with a girl she didn't recognize. The overwhelming urge to throw up welled up in her almost too rapidly for her to contain it. She used the hand not covering her mouth to quickly move the door back the way it was before she opened it, thankful they hadn't heard her; that done, she ran back to the guestroom, and into the bathroom attached, and gave into the retching that had overtaken her system._

_Done emptying the contents of her stomach, Zee walked over to the wall furthest away from her, intending to listen to what was going on in the room next door. She heard the expected sounds of flesh on flesh, and the very loud and somewhat overdone moans of the woman. That alone was enough to make her sick again. Not wanting to keep listening, but unable to pull herself away, she retook her post at the wall. This time, she heard actual dialogue between the pair._

_"Oh, Proto Zoa baby!" the woman shouted out. "Love me, love me, love me!"_

_"Oh yeah," he yelled back._

_She could hear the mattress squeaking more rapidly, and knew that they were almost done, but nothing could prepare her for what she'd hear next._

_"I love you, baby!" He yelled as he finished._

_"Oh my God," Zenon said aloud, to herself, in shock. "What happened to us?"_

__

She shook her head, jostling herself from the horrible memory. She hadn't slept all morning; deciding what to do. The final products of her efforts were the emptied drawers and half of the closet. After the two, in what once was their bedroom, had fallen asleep, Zenon crept in and cleared everything out. She couldn't keep living there, not knowing what had happened in her own bed.

Her mind going back to the current topic of conversation, she asked, "What did you… mess up?"

"I uh, kind of broke your Waterford Crystal vase upstairs. The one in the bathroom?" It was far from a lie, he did break her vase, only it was in anger at his self when he threw it on the floor.

Taken aback, not expecting to hear that, Zenon said, "Oh, that's fine, baby," a name she detested to call him since she heard her calling him that the night before, "I'll clean it up. But first, why don't I make you some breakfast? I'll make your favorites, pancakes, and you can go work out; and work up an appetite," she said, smiling sweetly. "Okay?" she asked, standing on her tiptoes to give him a kiss.

He looked down at her and smiled, "Alright, love," he replied, kissing her one more time before heading out to the gym, proud of himself for a job well done; hiding his affair.

Once he headed out the door, Zenon quickly got to work, carrying out the plan she'd formulated the entire restless morning. She went to the fridge, getting out the butter, before moving to the pantry and pulling out the syrup. She moved to the other side of the kitchen, reaching in one of the upper cabinets, pulling out a gravy boat. She squirted an unhealthy amount of syrup into it, putting it into the warming drawer, which she switched on. She put the margarine on the counter just above the drawer, alongside his protein shake, which he loved so much. Finally, she pulled a plate down, and with a sigh, placed it next to the gravy boat in the now-heated drawer. Inhaling deeply, she took her wedding band and engagement ring off, and placed them side-by-side on the center of the plate. She slid the drawer shut, quickly scribbled out a post it note, before continuing with the next phase of her plan, the bath and the getaway.

45 minutes later, Proto Zoa came out of his backyard gym and headed up the stairs to the kitchen door. A smile came to his face as he read Zee's note, which read:

_Hey Baby-_

_ Your pancakes are in the drawer along with warm syrup, margarine and shake are on the counter! I'm taking a nice hot bath to relax away the night of screaming kids. NO BOYS OR HUSBANDS ALLOWED!! My time!_

_ Much Love_

_ Zenon_

He opened the door, laughing out loud at her childish innocence. Shaking his head, he made his way to the sink to get a cool glass of water before chowing down on his breakfast she'd so lovingly made. Finishing it in about 3 swigs, he moved over to the warming drawer that contained his breakfast. She had, true to her word, had syrup in the drawer and margarine on the counter, alongside his shake. The only thing missing were the pancakes. Thinking he'd missed something, he closed the drawer and re-read her note. No, the pancakes were supposed to be there. He opened the heating device again, and noticed a glint of light catching on something in the middle of the plate. He reached down to pick whatever it was up, and was surprised to find two rings in his hand; her engagement ring and wedding band. His brows knitted in confusion, as a sudden panic spread through him. With a flash, he was upstairs and in their room, banging on the locked bathroom door.

"Zenon, tell me what this is about!" He shouted through the door to the louder-than-normal relaxation music.

Receiving no response he tried again, becoming increasingly agitated. "Zenon, open the damn door or I'll bust it in!" Still getting no response, he kicked the door in with one swift movement. He stormed in, only to see a tub full of suds, but no Zenon. An impending sense of doom filled him, as he grew increasingly afraid she'd done something horrible. He plunged his arms into the searing hot water, oblivious to any pain that would be there normally. Once he knew Zenon hadn't drowned herself, he slowly pulled his arms out, before turning towards the counter, which had a note taped on it. He took a few deep breaths, relief flooding him like a summer storm. He walked over the counter, and grabbed the note in his dry hand, an expressionless mask on his face quickly replaced by a look of defeat.

_Proto Zoa,_

_ Tell me I was dreaming, that you didn't leave me here to cry, you didn't say you don't love me anymore, and it was just my imagination telling lies…tell me that you didn't say goodbye._

_ But you did say goodbye. You said it just as you screamed out that you loved that girl last night, while you were making love to her. I suppose you've figured out that I'm gone; and so are all my things. I can't be here anymore. I can't even talk to you, much less look at you. Do you have any idea how hard it was for me to even be in the same room with you, much less kiss you and pretend that everything was okay? I can't express it in words; you've taken my heart and torn it to pieces. I don't think I can try again, and I don't think I want to._

_ What's her name? How long have you known her? How long have you been doing that with her? I saw the two of you last night. That's right; I lied to you in the kitchen. I got home at 1:30, not 7:45. I missed you too much to spend the night there without you. I'm glad to know how much you missed me too. I almost hate you for this, right now. I am crying as I write this, knowing that no matter how much I want to hate you forever, I know it's impossible, but it's not impossible for me to quit loving you at the drop of a hat, or the drop of a slutty red dress._

_How long have I been in the dark? Have I just been second hand goods to you? Is this marriage nothing but a sham? I feel like it is, and I can't keep trying. Have a nice life._

_ Yours ruined,_

_ Zenon_

Tears were streaming down his face as he read this output of emotion from her. It tore his heart in two, knowing he destroyed their marriage and most likely their friendship, for a very long time, if not forever. True to her word, she had cleaned up the broken vase, and ridded the trash of it, a good thing at the moment, since he would have liked nothing more than to end it all, right there. His life was gone. His wife was gone. And it was his fault. It was all his fault.


End file.
